The 'Lah' Syndrome - Why lah? Please lah! Don't Lah!

"Why lah?" a friend inquired with complete terseness. The curt, simple and direct 'Why lah' cut like a knife and  denotes a measure of bewilderment in the tone of it. I suppose a simpler 'Why?' would have sufficed, but the 'lah' suffix adds more melodrama where there isn't any. Besides, the 'lah' has been a staple of Malaysian language inflection for aeons, it is as immovable as a traffic congestion on the Federal Highway. It's not just a Manglish(or an English language) thing too... "Kenapa lah?" shock, surprise, even a tinge of disappointment. The Malay language is not spared from the 'lah' contagion.

Often used as a suffix that accentuates the dramatic effect of a phrase, 'lah' could be used in multiple ways:

• The classic 'Why lah?'
• The added for conviction 'Come on lah!'
• The added for surprise and shock 'WTF lah!'
• For added appeal or even being indignant  'Please lah!'
• The disillusioned 'I don't know lah!'
• Last but not least, the hybrid Malay/Manglish usage of 'Ya lah' as a statement of agreement.

So much melodrama in Malaysian speech. I suppose it mirrors the tendency of Malaysians to over exaggerate just about anything. Favourite football club lost a match? What the hell lah! I'm not going to watch football ever again! Quaint. Why lah? The weather is so blardy hot!(in this case, the why is known. But the 'lah' is used just for the banality of it. An extra suffix sticking out like a vestigial limb).

Malaysians aren't the most wordy and eloquent(in speech) species on earth but we seem to have a love affair with peppering our sentences with nonsensical suffixes like the 'lah'. That's an extra word that can add maybe one or two seconds to a spoken sentence, I posit. What on the surface seemed like a terse sentence turns out upon further rumination to be added fluff.

While the the sentimental types of you out there may opine that the 'lah' is a measure of Malaysian culture. As iconic as our Nasi Lemaks, Roti Canais, Rojak, atrocious weather, or even broken Manglish(which is frankly, a double negative. Imagine that if you could... some Malaysians can't even speak 'proper' Manglish). I say that's a bloody shame. If the only way of adding weight to a sentence is to use fluff like 'lah', we are all the poorer for it(I mean in a non financial way of course). 

Instead of adding fluff, melodramatic and dead words like 'lah, we should be enriching our speech with a more diverse range of vocabulary. Perhaps we could say "Well smack my senses and call me the devil! but why?" or maybe "That is shocking and revolting if it be true!". Or... maybe not. But please, for the love of all things beautiful, think of your spoken words and elevate them past our melodramatic over exaggerations. I mean... Come on lah!